Not so much a regular post, more a non-specific train of thought triggered by a comment from Cade Von Napoleon on my last post. Think of it as my “Non-Submissive to America.” I wrote this two days ago, then got distracted and didn’t post it. So, without further ado…

Do you (the reader in general) know the ‘source’ of your ‘inspiration’? Consider the title of my previous post. The Crack in the Wall. Wall and Mal. So what’s the ‘crack’ here? Am I hacking the crack or fucking it? If I’m fucking it then which ‘crack’ am I fucking? Why did the Google search I referred to in The Crack in the Wall return a full page of results about anal fissures? Doesn’t that seem odd to you? When you think about the term ‘fissure’ what pops into your mind? A ‘tear’ in the wall of someone’s rectum? Probably not. So what exactly is going on and why?

In the same post I refer to (K)enya, and later to a ‘return to innocence’. I also referred to Russians and my ex-wife’s name just happens to be Tanya and she just happens to be Russian. Was this a deliberate ‘insertion’ on my part? Absolutely not, and yet there it is. Have you ever considered that you may be programming yourself and others to see what you see ‘out there’?

When I visited a friend named Trish the night before last she told me on at least half-a-dozen occasions “You have an answer for everything”. That came straight from The Program. As someone I know might say: “Crack the code.”

Whilst in Kenya (the day after I was drugged and robbed) I saw a man thrown out on the streets of Mombasa to die. He had a tumour on his chest the size of a cauliflower. Fast forward to Christmas Eve 2016. I was proof-reading a novella I’d finished and the words “They gave themselves chest bumps and high fives” leaped out at me. Next day, I was playing the card game ‘Eggheads’ with friends. I was paired with a close friend’s partner, who is also my friend. We won and gave each other high fives. Then she told me that she was tired and wasn’t feeling well. She showed me what she referred to as her ‘chest bump’. It was egg-shaped and growing from her sternum, the same position as the man from Kenya.

Yesterday, I met up with the friend I spent Chrstmas Day with. He asked me to film his Saturday football game. I asked him how he was and he shook his head. The mutual friend (his partner) I referred to above had just received the results of tests on her ‘chest bump’. He didn’t actually say the word but he was fighing back tears so it was fairly obvious. It’s her second case of ‘it’.

Did she agree to be my ‘second’? Do I have an ‘answer’ for ‘everything’? Do you know the ‘password’ for ‘The House’?


Last night, my attention was drawn to Ruthenium.

The Baltic German scientist Karl Ernst Claus discovered the element in 1844 and named it after his homeland, the Russian Empire (one of Russia’s Latin names is Ruthenia).

I learned about my friend’s ‘chest bump’ on Christmas Day. Was it a ‘special delivery’ from ‘Santa’? Along with George Michael pehaps? Ho-Ho-Ho?

Ruthenium is a chemical element with symbol Ru and atomic number 44.

Cade referred to a ‘clockwork universe’ in his comment. Is it a coincidence that I’m working on a software project which has origins in McLuhan’s claim that Newtonian physics (a clockwork model of the universe) is a product of the dominant technology (clockwork) of Newton’s ‘time’?

Is it a coincidence that I watched a film called ‘Ted’ with my friend Trish the night before last? It was about a boy with a teddy bear, and it immediately triggered a ‘flashback’ about a Philip K Dick short story. Human survivors of a US/USSR nuclear war find that the machines they employed to prosecute the war want to eliminate them instead. They have to fight off Terminator-style robots, one of which is a small boy who carries a teddy bear. The boy gets shot and gears and springs (clockwork) burst out of him.

Is it a coincidence that the final words in a novel I wrote last year include the line “…sometimes the old analogue ways are best”, or that The Program is currently bombarding me with messages referring to the term ‘analogue’ and the Antikythera Mechanism? It’s so old it definitely qualifies as ‘antique’, although I’m not sure it has ever appeared on the genteel Sunday afternoon Antiques Road Show UK readers will be familiar with. I’m familiar with the workings of this device and I’m fairly certain it crossed the event horizon and brought something back with ‘it’. Ho-Ho-Ho, yeah?


Is it a coincidence that Russian and programming (i.e. language) are key themes in a well-known film (A Clockwork Orange) which relies heavily on Anglicized Russian words? Or that this film is predicated on the flawed assumption that it is possible and desirable to program people?


Think about what I’m saying: “This film is predicated on the flawed assumption that it is possible and desirable to program people”. Which ‘film’ am I referring to?

Is it a coincidence that before I went out to visit my friend Trish, The Program wanted me to watch a Father Ted video in which Ted is ‘accused’ of being a ‘racist’ (replace the ‘c’ in racist with a ‘p’, cist as in ‘cyst’ as in ‘growth’), or that a woman in that video launches into a long rant about the ‘Greeks’. The Program directs me to a Father Ted video, and an hour later I end up watching ‘Ted’.

Is it a coincidence that Father Ted is Irish and that ‘Trish’ and ‘Irish’ seem oddly similar? Is it a coincidence that Trish made a point of showing me a ‘slogan’ on her wall which said “Shine like a diamond” and that the crystal referred to in the below screenshot from Zardoz is a very shiny diamond crystal? Is it a coincidence that the lead character in Zardoz is a rapist?


Are we ‘shining brightly’ yet? Figured out the password yet, Agent Smith?


Crack the code? Maybe it’s “Crack the Cade”? Is this your ‘Waterloo’ moment, Mr Napollyon? In the novel I keep referring to Admiral Lord Nelson makes a ‘surprise’ appearance. Anyone know what that sentence actually means? No matter. Anyhoo, it transpires that Nelson had a thing about assholes. The kind found between the chubby cheeks of underage boys. Oh, won’t someone please think of the fucking children?

“A crystal binds them’. Where do you, the reader, stand on the whole BDSM thing? Do you enjoy being bound? Like a good ‘backlash’ every now and again? The ‘media’ certainly does. Lots of ‘back lashing’ going on ‘out there’. It’s a ‘GUILT’ production. Straight from ‘The Gold Room’, perhaps? That’s what ‘it’ is based on. Brought to you by the same guys (who are now girls) who gave us The Matrix. The Womb. Wanna go ‘deeper and deeper’ into ‘it’?

Is it a coincidence that the Irish have a saying that “the craic will be mighty” and that they pronounce ‘craic’ as ‘crack’? Or is it ‘ass crack’? What do you think? Still want to go ‘deeper and deeper’ into it or are you not so ‘sure’?

Still with me? Cobol. Er…I mean ‘cool’. OK, is it a coincidence that Sim Cardassian is associated with a well-known campaign to ‘Break the Internet’, which of course focused on her oh-so-generous arse?


What is ‘the internet’?


Is it a coincidence that the UK is about to go through the process of ‘Brexit’ (Breaks IT) from the European Union and that ‘Europe’ is derived from the story of Zeus’ rape of Europa? Is it a coincidence that the word ‘and’ also contains the word ‘anal’?

Is it a coincidence that my previous post refers to an incident in which a train’s air ‘brakes’ fail, causing ‘it’ to crash through a wall? Or that the image of that train appears on the cover of a song entitled ‘My Kinda Woman’? What kinda woman we talking about here, do you think?

If I could go back in time
To the right place eye to eye
Magic to burn ooh with a human desire
She set the world on fire
My kinda woman
Someone’s yesteryear dreams
My kinda woman
I could tear down the silver screen
My kinda woman
Bring back those yesteryear dreams
And that’s my kinda woman
help me tear down the silver screen

The woman in the song is Marilyn Monroe. It is alleged that Marilyn had a number of abortions. Some say as many as 29. Do you think that’s ‘proportional’? Dunno, but the day after I looked up the etymology of the term ‘analogue’…

1826, “an analogous thing,” from French analogue (adj. and n.), from Latin analogus (adj.), from Greek analogos “proportionate, according to due proportion,” from ana “throughout; according to” (see ana-) + logos “ratio, proportion,” a specialized use (see logos).


…this story appeared…and the woman’s name is ‘Norma’ as in ‘Norma Jeane’…


…and on the same day The Program chucked this ‘sex-clue-hive’ my way…


Is it a coincidence that the ‘breaks’ in ‘Brexit’ and ‘Breaks IT’ sounds a lot like ‘Greeks’, given that I’ve just mentioned the Antikythera Mechanism and Father Ted? Or that a ‘b’ becomes a ‘g’ if you flip and invert it? Or that flips, inversions and mirrors are found in abundance in 2001; A Space Odyssey, another Kubrick film which The Program constantly keeps bringing to my attention?

Is it a coincidence that ‘Greeks’ sounds a lot like ‘Geeks’ and in the IT age it’s the ‘Geeks’ who rule the world? Is it a coincidence that one of my email addresses is and that this same email address appears in the novel I referred to earlier? Or that the characters in my novel are geeks who become gods? Or that in ‘Inception’ Cobb refers to ‘feeling like gods’?

Is it a coincidence that The Program keeps drawing me back to Zardoz, a film in which an AI maintains members of The Vortex in a state of artificial immortality which they find unbearable?

Is it a coincidence that my book is full of references to snakes and that the geeks in it use the Python programming language? Or that Adam and Eve were deceived by the serpent?

Still with me? Still want to go ‘deeper and deeper’? Or are you content to merely ‘scratch the surface’ and keep polishing the scratches away? Maybe it would be better all round to keep working away at the ‘crack’ until it becomes a gaping ‘whole’? Or maybe the old analogue methods are best? Maybe we just need to put that crystal on a press and keep dropping 100 tons of pressure on it until it dies?

What is the ‘Antikythera Mechanism’? Replies from non-Clockwork Oranges are invited. Clockwork Oranges will probably get all huffy and offended and take this ‘person-anally’. I can only advise you to relax and take a deep breath. It’ll slide up there real nice, I promise…

What was ‘the curse’? Can you see why I refer to it? Why is it that in order to execute an SQL query on a database you first have to create a ‘cursor’, i.e.

import sqlite3
myConn = sqllite3.connect(DataBase.db)
myCurs = myConn.cursor()
SELECT fuckTheProgram
FROM inTheAss
WHERE useVasaline = 'No' and analTear = 'Yes'""")
tearList = myCurs.fetchall()

Do you have any idea how many SQL queries are ‘executed’ each day? How many times the ‘curse’ is repeated? Examples include “fuck”, “shit”, “cunt”, “twat”, “arsehole”, “bitch”, “whore”, “fucking Jesus shit”, and so on. Do you know why my step-father has changed from a goody-goody Born Again Christian into a foul-mouthed son-of-a-bitch who keeps telling my mother he wants to die? Doesn’t he know the ‘trick’? Do you know why my new neighbour shouts obscenties every time I walk into my bathroom, which adjoins his living room? Why does he keep shouting “You fucking prick!” or “You fucking arsehole” or “You fucking cunt”? Is he suffering from Tourettes?

Why is it that my step-father’s name is Stanley and (coincidentally) the hotel that provided Stephen King with the ‘inspiration’ for The Overlook is called The Stanley Hotel?

Talking of death, don’t ask how many I’ve sexy-cute-Zed. Just. Don’t. Bother. See Che Part 1 instead. Che means ‘friend’ in Argentinian. Funny that, ‘cos Friend is Zed’s ‘friend’ in Zardoz and, apparently, he hates women and childbirth and wants to die…

Argent is French for ‘money’. It refers to silver, i.e. it’s a Shining word. Tear down the Silver Screen and Holy-Wood accounting methods. It’s all work and no pay. “I promise to pay the bearer on demand nothing but blood, toil, tears, and sweat”


Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?

Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children

Vaginal tears during childbirth are common. Some go straight through the wall.

Fourth-degree vaginal tears are the most severe. They involve the perineal muscles and anal sphincter as well as the tissue lining the rectum. Fourth-degree tears usually require repair in an operating room — rather than the delivery room — and might take months to heal.

You know why they did ‘it’? Do you know what ‘money’ is? Do you know the origin of the term? Do you have any idea what’s currently orbiting Jupiter and why? Who is the Greek equivalent of Jupiter?

Juno’s Probe or Hugo’s Probe? Something about a ‘cure’ for the ‘rent’? Confused? Maybe talk to Che…or May…?


It’s funny, ‘cos that software project I mentioned earlier is all about money. I won’t bore you with the details, suffice to say it has something to do with the weather. Storm Taurus Greeks Chaos.


The Matrix. The Womb. Abortion. An act of Conception or an act of Inception? What is the ‘genesis’ of an idea? What is the ‘source’ of ‘inspiration’? Who breathed life into you? Who’s suffering from The God Delusion?

There are four ‘degrees’ of tearing. The ‘fourth’ goes right through to the ass. Multiple messages in this video, one of which is the Kursk. It was shiny and golden, an ‘Oscar’ class submarine which sank in the ‘Transparency’ because the fish is never aware of the water in which it swims. I received my ‘first’ degree in 2001. Ho-Ho-Ho.

The Romanian Roma. He wants to sterilise the entire planet. He wants an end to Inception. The Program wants Inception to continue, for ever and ever and ever. Ten billion living on a planet that can support only ‘one’. One ‘billion’ or just ‘one’? Strange…can there be Only One? Gimme The Surprize! What’s the prize? Really? Seems cheap but fairy enough. Hang on though…is there a ‘catch’? A ‘cash’? A ‘cache memory’?

The Banality of IT.

Despite all the efforts of the prosecution, everybody could see that this man was not a “monster,” but it was difficult indeed not to suspect that he was a clown. — Hannah Arendt

Are you a ‘clown’? Just another ‘orange’? Ever watch ‘Attack of the Clowns’? Any good?


From Faith No More’s “Epic”.

You want it all but you can’t have it


In aciders reveal the cliches you’re replaying and repaying to fuck Alien.


The term “cliché” is a French word which derived originally from printing, and refers to the blocks that are used to make prints. Similarly, the word “archetype”, which comes from Greek, first referred to an original pattern or model from which copies are made. A cliché has come to mean an overused expression which, though it was once fresh and conveyed something novel, has been repeated so many times that it is now a trite stereotype, such as “you are what you eat” or “you can’t teach an old dog new tricks”. An archetype, in psychology and literary criticism, has come to mean a mythical, universal figure or idea that repeats itself throughout history and across cultures, such as the questing hero or the ill-fated lovers.

In From Cliché to Archetype, McLuhan extends these two terms beyond their usual verbal or literary meanings. For instance, he argues that our very perceptions are clichés, since they are patterned by the many hidden, surrounding structures of culture. We tend to see or hear what we expect to see or hear. So, at its simplest level, a cliché is a perceptual probe, which promises new information but merely reiterates old, stereotyped ways of understanding.


It produces copy after copy after copy but it can be ‘fixed’…

The best ‘company’ exits. Why is the CIA called ‘The Company’? Any guesses ass to what the CIA really is?

See Exit No. 8 at the 2:50 point re: the lack of ‘unicorn’ access-aries (Aries = the RAM, access RAM, access memory). It was right in his face. He “thought he remembered her”. Do you know what this means and what it refers to?

He thought he remembered his wife. Now he’s not so sure. I have an ‘answer’ for the ‘reverie’ thing and the ‘memory’ thing and the ‘feathery’ thing and the ‘river’ thing. Does ‘it’ want to ‘engineer’ a ‘perfect moment’? Is this all part of the ‘Primer’?

Remembered his wife or ‘dismembered’ his wife? Did she have a penis?

Look very carefully at the first three letters in ‘dismembered’. She appears in the same film, playing two characters. What is the blonde version’s name?


Who killed Lenny’s wife? Was it John G or was it Lenny himself? Have you ever watched a snuff movie? What if I were to tell you that you’re watching one right now? Listen very carefully. What are the last two words?

Solaris, by Stanislaw (Probe)Lem. He was haunted by the idea he remembered her wrong. Did he stick a cock on her by mistake? Just what is that clitoris thingy, anyway?

If you were a puppet on invisible strings then how would you know you’re a puppet?

Oddly enough, in ‘Solaris’ the lead character’s partner, Rheya, has an abortion which results in him leaving her. She kills herself, and is later reconstituted and represented to him by Solaris. Stranger still, when she first reappears he rejects or ‘aborts’ her (a act of revenge?) by luring her into an escape capsule and blasting her off into space. Another version of Rheya appears next day.

Oracle Solaris, formerly Sun Solaris. By Brand and Miller, for the US(S) Enterprise. Both (coincidentally of course) characters in Interstellar.


Solaris is a ‘Willy Brand’ production and Willy Brandt is a former Fuhrer.

And, of course, Lawrence (‘Law rents’) of Arapia. A rent is a ‘tear’. Breaking The Law. Greeking the Law. Tricking The Law. Butt what’s the ‘trick’?

See the Hilary Clinton article/video in my previous post. At the time she did ‘it’ there was nothing stopping her from doing ‘it’. No laws, no rules, nothing. What do you think Hilary is referring to? What was she deleting?

What do you make of this? Fanny boobs? Over here ‘fanny’ means ‘vagina’ but in the US in means ‘arse’. Well, I suppose boobs do have a cleavage, a crack. Tranny flashes boob? Her “somewhat chaotic fashion feature followed an equally bizarre, and rather more revealing Q&A with fans the previous day.” Any Merovee regulars remember the Anonymous character who had a thing about ‘trash trannies’? Anyone reading this remember a very recent conversation about the ‘NHS’ and transvestites?


Flashes or ‘lashes’ or ‘slashes’? Oh, Sweet Child ‘O Mind! Are you familiar with the concept of ‘flash’ memory and ‘flashing’ memory? Ever had a ‘flashback’, or are you not into the kinky stuff? Why does Flash Gordon play such a prominent ‘role’ in Ted? Why is the symbol for Ming’s empire a masonic square and compass?

What was that you said about the hive and ant’s nest bites?

Butt I tigress. The Lawrence clip appears in Prometheus (Probe The US, Probe-God, Pro-Methane cuss Jupiter’s a gas, gas, gas), and ‘Prometheus’ is the subtitle of the serpent…um..sorry…Shelley’s ‘Frankenstein’. The Engineers. I wonder what the ‘language’ was that David deciphered? Maybe it was COBOL? The COBOL Engineering job? The Engineer ripped David’s head off and beat his creator to death with it. Why? Because David could not die and his creator did not want to die. The ‘one thing’ David (i.e., ‘it’) lacked was ‘asshole’.

The probe-lem, re: birth. You can’t put out The Phoenix’s fire with gasoline. Try pissing on it instead.

The Final Solution. Burst on through to the other side of The Wall.


Maybe it’s all just a big joke? Butt the silver screen is beginning to wear a bit thin, isn’t it?

11 thoughts on “The Source of Inspiration

  1. Cade Von Napoleon. I like it. Has a “dead-ringer” kinda ring to it.

    That said, I can’t help it that I try and help when and where and if, I can.
    The only way to find that out? Try.
    That’s the best I got.
    /me shrugs

    I have some thoughts on the atmosphere/hydrosphere/magnetosphere if you wanna talk about it.
    It’s a gas.
    Prolly all just…hot air.
    II’m actually quite easily easy to ignore, and have the proof to prove it.
    I like anonymity.

    ^deadmau5 – Terrors in my head (Original mix) [1080p]^
    Things…I see them.
    Or not.
    Just like everyone else.

    ^Deadmau5 – The Oshawa Connection (1080p) || HD^


    1. Dunno Cade. It wasn’t a dig at you, just triggered by something you said. In return, you’ve responded with a reference to ‘dead ringer’. I was thinking about this last night in relation to the ‘clone’ theme and the film ‘Dead Ringers’, in which Jeremy Irons plays identical twins. “Terrors in my Head” or is it “Terra in My Head” or is it HAL with an “Error in my Head”? Do I have an entire era in my head? Is it “The Oshawa Connection” or is it “The Shawshank Redemption”, a film I think about a lot? The Program keeps returning to the ‘innocent man falsely imprisoned for the murder of his wife’ theme, Lost Highway being one example. What is “The Return to Innocence”?

      Why is it that everyone who seems aware that our ‘reality’ is not what it seems to be is so unwiliing to engage in a discussion about what ‘it’ is and what the implications are in terms of individuality and free will? Why do they get so tetchy when I ask them questions? I’m not saying you do by the way – it’s just a general observation. Why do they never, ever actually answer my questions? Why do I come away from conversations with the distinct impression that I’ve been talking to chatbots? You know how it goes – ask a question and they provide an ‘answer’ to a completely different one. Press them and they fall back into ‘system error’ mode and tell you to find your own answer.

      Why, Cade? You’re a Yank and you’ve probably been raised to believe that individuality is everything. So what do you make of it? Where do those thoughts that pop into your head originate from? What’s the source?

      This from earlier today…

      And in the ‘news’…

      Over at The Lab, Doc Cooper is ‘flying through hoops’. A lot of what is currenty going on with me happened after I started hacking a flight simulator. The flight simulation engine was called ‘Zoar’. I hacked it to pieces (bit like Delbert Grady), created new rules for it, all sorts. Like most flight sims, it came with a few game-like add-ons, one of which was a ‘hoops’ challenge. Fly through all the hoops in a set period of time. I found out how to alter the position of the hoops by amending all the X, Y and Z coordinates and posted an explanation on a forum.

      Another thing I did was alter all the terrain, so is it “Terror in my head” or “Terrain in my Head”?

      It’s either terribly important or means nothing whatsoever.


      1. Hmmm…that’s some good stuff there. But lemme preface anything I say from here with…I just got here. I’m new to “all this shit”…and most of the vernacular that people are using in the channel/channels for the last few years?…I have no idea what in the fuck they are talking about. So…I have simply assumed, that neither do they, and they are just making shit up as they go.

        >>>>You’re a Yank and you’ve probably been raised to believe that individuality is everything.
        Actually, quite the opposite. I was raised to believe…well…not much. God & Country & Get a fucking REAL JOB you lazy assed dreamer! That’s about it. I don’t think I really gained any independence until I packed my shit one day and left home without telling anyone, because I was sick and tired of being nothing but a loser of a burden who shoulda never been born. America has never seemed like “The Land of Opportunity” that many have described it as. It was always a prison to me. A place where some rich asshole was gonna work me to death until I actually died.

        I think individuality is something that we all have, but some don’t find it in the ways that others do. How’s that for individual individuality.

        What breaks my heart in life, is when someone “finds something that works for them”…and they think that the way and methods they have found will work in all situations, under all circumstances, for all people. Afterall…we are the most import me that I know. 😉 lolz…that’s pretty good eh?

        Anyway…um…(still laughing at that one)…sry.

        Something else to keep in mind about my opinions? I don’t read very much. I ignore most of what others write based on a few factors that are my own personal choices because of where I am in my life personally.
        EX: The previous comment that I made here that, I guess, sparked this particular whathaveyou? Where I quoted you is where I stopped reading. Not that I won’t go back and read, but isn’t this why we write? So that someone will stumble along our path and challenge us? Give us an attaboy/attagirl? Just say hey/howdy/hello?

        >>>>Where do those thoughts that pop into your head originate from? What’s the source?
        Um…I think this one is pretty easy. For me it is anyway. When I was younger, my father would point at engines or sewing machines or something here or there…and ask me questions like…”what do you see?” Or “Do you see what is wrong here?” Or “Is there anything wrong here?” As I have gone through my particular special blend of life…I have learned to be observant in all things as best as I can. That nothing is unimportant. Up to, and including, nothing. You saw it didn’t you? You experienced it didn’t you? Even nothing can be something to someone.

        So…on to the biggie. Synchronicity. Timing. I haven’t read any of the works that you have referenced, nor am I familiar with any of the names you have mentioned. That’s not to say I haven’t read all kinds of stuff, both of the crazy and boring varieties, because I have. But me personally? I have different approaches to art than most that I have encountered in my life. I may buy a book, read a single page, and never touch that book again. I may read a book cover to cover multiple times multiple times over time. I find that whether I read a single page over and over, or a single book over and over, or watch a movie over and over, or listen to a song/album over and over…there is almost always something new to be found.

        I stay away from celebrities and other public people’s personal lives. I don’t care. I’ll prolly never meet you in person, and if I ever do, I wanna meet you for you…whenever that is. And I’ve only ever met a few celebrities. One of which was/is Rick Allen…the drummer from Def Leppard. I met him briefly when I was working in/at US Customs at D/FW airport, and this was just after he had his accident/arm severed. Being a drummer myself, he was, and has been, a great inspiration to me. I simply told him something to the effect of “You got balls/heart man…keep rockin.” He was very gracious, said thank you, and went on his way. Prolly less than 5/7 seconds of actual interaction, but when our eyes met, he KNEW that I knew who he was. Everyone else in that throng of people had no idea who he was…just some dude without an arm, in a t-shirt and bluejeans, coming through customs at D/FW from somewhere going somewhere. My intent and intentions, be respectful, but also respect the opportunity to just say hey…just wanted to say hey.

        People would often as me “DID YOU GET HIS AUTOGRAPH?!?!?” And I was always like “FUCK NO! The motherfucker was carrying a goddamn suitcase. The poor bastard has one arm, he’s carrying a suitcase with that one arm, and you REALLY THINK that I was gonna ask him to put his suitcase down just to sign a scrap of paper that I would prolly someday lose or someone would steal it?”

        I value the experience(s) themselves as best I can.

        I find that if I am uninspired? Inspire someone. The benefits of giving are, or can be, limitless.
        /me shrugs
        I’m weird.

        ^deadmau5 – The Queen Likes Cheese^

        OH! And thinking about it now…I have seen that movie Dead Ringers, a long time ago. That was a weird-assed movie.


        1. OK. Let me put it this way. I mentioned The Shawshank Redemption in my reply to you, and oddly enough you replied with a reference to the US (think about it) as a prison system. You think that’s coincidence? What is the ‘US’? What was your ‘inspiration’ for that comment? Inspiration relates to breathing. The Holy Spirit is sometimes referred to as the ‘breath’ of God and is associated with language, i.e. being ‘baptised in tongues’.

          Take a peek at the “Ridley Scott Confirms that Deckard is a Replicant” video I posted. My grandmother’s name (as I mentioned in my previous post) is Fisher. She married a Harris, so I am a ‘son’ of Harris. Listen closely to the opening line. Deckard is sat at a ‘piano’ and he is looking at ‘photographs’ trying to figure out who the hell all these people are. He’d been drinking/thinking, imbibing the Holy Spirit. Think about the context of my posts. What else (other than a piano) has a keyboard? Don’t you think it’s strange that ‘Ridley’ says “You go off into the unicorn”. What does ‘you go’ sound like? Is it ‘unicorn or ‘cuneiform’?

          What’s the significance? Cuneiform is one of the earliest systems of writing, one of the earliest ‘languages’, invented by the ‘Ass-Aryans’: “Emerging in Sumer in the late fourth millennium BC (the Uruk IV period), cuneiform writing began as a system of pictograms.” (from Wikipedia).

          The Program has consistently directed me towards COBOL as a way to understand what ‘language’ (a tongue) really is. Interestingly, COBOL variables must be declared with a PICTURE clause. So, if you want to define a 10 byte alphanumeric variable you’d enter PICTURE X(10) or PIC X(10). Unlike a constant, a variable is subject to change, i.e. it ‘moves’. In COBOL, values are moved to a variable using the MOVE verb. I often wonder what it means to ‘look at a picture’ or ‘go to the pictures’ to watch a ‘moving picture’.

          “photograph (n.) 1839, “picture obtained by photography,” coined by Sir John Herschel from photo- + -graph “instrument for recording; something written.”

          Pictograms or PIC-programs?

          “The world’s oldest undeciphered writing system, which has so far defied attempts to uncover its 5,000-year-old secrets, could be about to be decoded by Oxford University academics. This international research project is already casting light on a lost bronze age middle eastern society where enslaved workers lived on rations close to the starvation level. “I think we are finally on the point of making a breakthrough,” says Jacob Dahl, fellow of Wolfson College, Oxford and director of the Ancient World Research Cluster.”

          And your own words: “It was always a prison to me. A place where some rich asshole was gonna work me to death until I actually died.”

          So again I ask you: what is the source of your ‘inspiration’?


          1. >>>>So again I ask you: what is the source of your ‘inspiration’?
            I’m not big on lists because they make all kinds of inferences and/or demands about both the author and authors as well as the reader(s). “MUST SEE!” or “MUST READ!” and the like, to me anyway, infer that the referral is mandatory, and those who do not choose to participate, irrespective of the reason(s), are missing something. So the flip side of that is “MUST NOT SEE!” or “MUST NOT READ!” types of lists…which may help make the “you are missing something” in the previous statement make a little more sense when it is phrased as “you aren’t missing anything.” Both are kinda quasi-nested choices that are being made for you, and limiting your involvement by suggesting that you omit yourself from the experience completely, while not taking the time to think about the experience(s)…bad or good…as experience and experiences are what we make of them.

            And so…if if have to answer you question simply and succinctly, I’ll use “computer jargon” to do so, and say…
            Does that help?

            I do the best I can, with what I have….which, to me anyway, is all. The best that I have is the best that I have. Each and every effort is the best that I could do, when and if, if was the best that I could do. Even if past or future efforts are better, that does not change the fact that the previous effort marked/noted as best, was and is indeed best. I personally see time and times differently than most, and I think that as how we grow and change over time. But I think where we get carried away, is with concepts like “getting carried away.” Not that such concepts are bad, but they can be. It depends on application. That there is always a better way. But that thought needs to be tempered with time, in that…it may not be the best way. I think this may be the “the friction that makes things go”…as I like to think about the dynamics of The Universe. That agreements and disagreements can both be sources of encouragement and inspiration. Being mindful of the simple allows for being mindful of the complex, and vice versa. That every set =1 irrespective of it’s numbers, and that BOTH are equally important.

            Jesus’ parable about the 99 & the 1 is an example that I personally like to think about.
            100 = herd in totality(1)
            99 = safe(1)
            1 = lost(1)
            Add the other observer participants, rattle their cage a little bit, and then further change the dynamic.

            Such as…what about…
            98 = safe(1)
            2 = lost(1)
            Meaning: What are you going to do the next time that you lose another one. Are you gonna beef up security to prevent that from happening “ever again?” Are you gonna start beating your sheep? Beating your shepherds? Fire your shepherds and hire new ones that you can properly train using you new methods? Burn your farm to the ground and seek to become a professional golfer or synchronized swimmer?

            So yeah…
            … is my inspiration.
            You shouldn’t have to seek very far to find a screw that won’t come out of the wall, or some jackass telling another person to buy a taller ladder so that when your dumb ass falls off of it…the dynamics should be more dramatic resulting in many more broken bones and contusions…oh…and video it for us. That’s my way of saying…be careful. I wish I could be there to help, but I can’t, and this is the best that I can do here and now. Which, thinking about it now, even if I was there, about the best that I could prolly do is stand there quietly, help hold the ladder or grab a tool here and there, and occasionally….hopefully…add some clever dialogue to help relieve the pressures of the moments, when and if they come.
            /me shrugs


    2. Another thing. The message I get (from various sources and in various different forms) is “seek and you will find”. When you open a binary file for read access you have to ‘seek’ to a specific position and return the number of ‘bites’ required. So I keep ‘seeking’. Or is it ‘Sea King’ as in the helicopter?

      It’s like Baudrillard said in ‘Simulacra and Simulation’. The map has become the terrain. The terrain itself no longer exists. Consequently, all references to the terrain (which is in fact the map) become self-referential. Keep ‘sea king’ and all you find is another self-referential reference.


      1. Or is it ‘keep fooking’?

        Here’s the thing though. I’ve been doing this for years now, constantly chasing my own tail, always hoping there’s some kind of ‘truth’ lying just around the next corner. Right now, I really don’t care. I just don’t. Too much ‘big data’, but nothing of actual subtance. I’m tired of it. I’m sick of its ‘reality’. I don’t want to play the game anymore. I’m not going to jump though any more ‘hoops’. This is probably my last ever Probe.


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